Guild Wars 2 Beta Key Contest

and the bartender said “that joke starts out with a rhyme”

… and the bartender says, “get the f*** outta here.”

The bartender says “What do you think this is? SOME KIND OF A JOKE? GET OUT!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and they have a pretty good time and went home at a reasonable time.

…but only charr arrived, because asura and sylvari not yet available.

spid3r1833@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…the charr was instantly kicked out NO ANIMALS IN THIS BAR

… ransack the whole place, steal all the beer, and go around in a drunken rage destroying whatever looks threatening. 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar because Hitler.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The charr says: “I’ll have something with a bang!” The asura says: “I’ll have something intelligent.” The sylvari says: “What’s a bar?”

 i really want to try~~~~~plx give me a KEY!!!

…which is actually all inside the depressed head of a Guild Wars fanatic who can’t come up with a Guild Wars 2 joke

Bartender says what would you like… charr says “ill have a charr-wiser”. Sylvari would like some water… and the asura is paying. The asura replies…”sorry, im a little short”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The Asura asks for a wrench, the sylvari asked for a bucker of water and some plant food, while the charr in all his armor asks for a bowl of milk.

An asura, sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar, and they all look up and ask “Is this some kind of joke?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…

The
bartender then says: “minors are not allowed, even in company with an adult!”
 

a: knock knock.
b: who’s there?
a: interrupting cow
b: int-
a: MOOOO

An Asura, Sylvari and a Human were each left 5,000 ecto by a rich Norn on condition that after his death they would each put 100 ecto into his coffin in case he needed it in the afterlife. 
The Asura and the Sylvari duly put in their hundred ecto. The Human took out the 200 ecto and put in a IOU for 300 ecto.  :)

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…the charr gets so drunk he mistakenly uses the Asura as a barstool and the sylvari’s garments for wiping his mouth after having a Tyria ‘especial grilled steak. My email is Alestron@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar to try and fill the void in their hearts that was left there after the last Guild Wars 2 beta weekend.

An asura, sylvari and charr walk into a bar… Actually the asura walked under it.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
the asura orders milk, then the sylvari order a tomato juice, but the charr didn’t order anything… he says, starring at the two others: “i won’t drink, i just planned to eat some meat”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and sit beside two World of Warcraft players. They pick up their mugs of ale, and the WoW players yell “WHAT KIND OF SORCERY IS THIS?!”

they nuked the crowd and echo-nuked the survivors.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…… 5 hours later come out and sing: “I got a hangoooveeeer…óó…óóó..ó…!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
…Han Solo still shot first.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar……they demand drinks, but not enough Karma.

walk into the GW2 HQ and complain that their starting places haven’t been released yet! Hopefully the Asura will show ‘little’ mercy as I want to be an Asura already! 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… to make jokes about humans and the strategy to kill them or to just take a chill pill.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your mom is a whore.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar chased by undead minions. *Cue Benny Hill Chase music*

@RaccoonFran

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… i dont need to complete this sentence…it is a joke already cause that would never happen !! :)))

An asura, sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar where the asura buys a round for everyone. A few minutes later, everyone is knocked out on the floor and the asura says, “Ignorant clods, don’t you know you should never accept drinks from strangers? I mean anyone can drop nuero-chemical sleep agents in a beverage, but that is probably too big of a word for you.” 

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar…
Each of them
orders a beer. Three flys fly into the tavern and one fly lands in each creature’s drink.
The Sylvari pulls the fly out of his beer, says “Well, it’s alright” and drinks the beer down.
The Asura shows his beer with the fly still inside to the barman and asks for another beer.
The Charr grabs the fly out of the beer, takes it by it’s wings, while yelling
“Cough it up, you wee theivin’ bastard!”

teo.martina@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… they Walked on wet water and hit there heads on the table.the bartender asks:No wet charr’s allowed

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… nek minute they wasted.

A Norn, an Asuran and a Sylvari walk into a bar.
The barman says to the Norn, ‘Whadda ye want?’
The Norn says, ‘A whole keg of yer strongest plonk!’
He serves the Norn, then says to the Asuran, ‘so whadda ye want?’
The Asuran says, ‘Ill have a glass of water. I’m taking care of my brain, unlike my dumbass companion here!’
The barman, annoyed, says to the Sylvari, ‘I suppose you’ll be wantin a glass o water too eh?’
The Sylvari says, ‘No sir, I’ll just have a glass of ice’.
The barman, confused, gives him a glass of ice, and asks him again if he wants anything in it.
The Sylvari says he’s sure, while the Norn and Asuran snicker.
The Sylvari takes the glass, squats in the corner, and fills the glass up with his own water.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar. After a couple of beers they’re getting drunk. When suddenly the Charr growls in the bar : ” All you guys on the leftside of me in the bar are idiots “. Then he asks ” Anyone got a problem with that ? “.

No one dares reply him.
After another beer he roars : ” You guys on the right side in the bar are all scum ! ”
He looks around and says ” Anyone got a problem with that ? ”
When suddenly the Asura gets up from his stool.  The Charr replies : ” You got a problem buddy ? ”
The Asura answers: ” Oh no, I’m just on the wrong side of the bar “ 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar,
the asura gets thrown out for looking underage, the charr gets high on catnip and has to be carried outside by an asura mech and the sylvari gets mistaken for salad, this is where her story ends.

[oh god I'm terrible with jokes please don't hate me]
[I want a beta key though :3c]

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the sylvari asks for two beers for him and the asura and a human worker as a snack for the charr. The barman tells him he’s sorry but he’s only got asuran workers in today. The sylvari replies “Don’t bother then, he’s a bugger on shorts”

An asura and a sylvari are walking though the country side, then the asura say:”Are you sylvaris group up as like a tree?”…”no…as you guys never get toller! And geting greater then used as lumbers is not a good idea!…=_=”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The charr looks at the bartender and suddently he gets angry. Then the night has come and the land is dark, and the moon is the only light he’ll see. But he wont be afraid as he smacks the bartender in the face. He walks out and hit a stone and falls and BAM he woke up from his dream. THE END

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar ,then charr orders a 
Grenth’s Grog .After he drinks it he leaves the bar without paying . Next day charr with his mates go again in the bar , charr oders again a grenths grog , but the bartenders says him that he needs to pay the 1st one in order to get other . Charr looked at him and he said  that he knew karate . The bartender said :i know karate too , then charr replied to him : ”Then get a free drink too” :P

After a couple of drinks, the Charr looks around and asks “Where is my Asura friend?” None reacted. “WHERE IS THE ASURA???” he yelled while drawing his sword. Finally the sylvari replies: “He is sitting right next to you, you furry idiot!”
The charr looks next to him and calmly says to the Asura: “Did you see and hear that?Asura: “What are you talking about???”
Charr: “This is some amazing ale, i can hear speaking trees! What’s next? Panda’s trying to kill the dragons with kung-fu?”  

tomymaxy@hotmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the human bartender says: “Where’s Bjorn today? He couldn’t stand my Ale recipe, eh?”

An asura, sylavari and a charr walk into a bar….

Asura is a money junkSylavari is a alcholistCharr is a homosexualAll 3 die when they walked into the bar, they all went to hell.in hell they speak to the devil, the devil has a deal for a 3 of them to go back to earth.Asura cant have any money anymore or he will go to hellSylavari cant drink anymore or he will go to hellAnd Charr cant have intercourse with men or he will go to hell
Once back on earth they walked back into the bar, and Sylavari thought i want a beer but no. then he sees the best beer in the world and drinks it. POOF!!!! and gone is Sylavari.Asura sits on a chair and sees a dollar, no my life isnt a dollar worth it. then he sees 50 dollar, no no my life isnt 50 dollar worth it. then he sees a briefcase with a million dollar on the floor, He bends over and POOF!!!!!! CHARR is gone:Dps. sorry for my bad english

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…And they saw that a Norn attacks another one misses and hits the bartender. Then a dynamic event occurs.

An Asura, Sylvari and Charr walk into a bar… Only the Charr made it back out

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and the bartender say: ”why such a long faces”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
Bartender says: “So. Why the ugly faces?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender says: “Oh c’mon, you three again?”

An asura, sylvari and a norn walk into a tavern. The asura suggests playing a game to see who can drink the most. They accept and everyone bets 800 gold. The norn wants to go first so he can scare the two minnows with his drinking prowess, and so he drinks two  large barrels of ale. Sylvari is definitely intimidated, but he’ll give it a try. He drinks a mug, and collapses down because his leaves got corrupted with alcohol. 

The norn is laughing, so the asura asks for three barrels. The whole tavern stops and casts a doubting glance at the tiny elementalist. He takes it with a pinch of salt, and drinks everything he asked. The norn walks away in shame. He got beat by an asura. He stops and asks the tiny creature ‘How did you do that?’. The asura says ‘I paid the tavern keep 200 gold to fill three barrels of water when I ask him to!’

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.  The asura proposed to do a challenge – first of them who’ll get a free beer from bartender, win. Then the charr bought a beer and he had started to drink it both with the sylvari, when the bartender unexpectedly asked the charr: ‘Why are you letting her to drink it? It’s your beer!” Charr answered “I just want to make her easier.” And the bartender said “Okay, have one more on the house!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. They were told there kind wasent welcome…Now there’s a smoldering pile of rubble where the bar used to be

An Asura, Sylvari and Charr walk into a bar. The Charr looks back at the Sylvari and asks “can you smell cabbage?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…all three of them sit down and order drinks. The asura orders a nice, refreshing glass of Alchemicola, the sylvari orders a tall glass of V8 Splash with a cowpat sidecar, and then the charr speaks up loudly, “I’ll have Meatmalt liquor………on the rocks.” The bartender then furnishes their drinks, but the asura and sylvari look puzzled. They both turn to the charr and ask, “What’s with the long pause?” The charr responds while looking at his hands, “Oh these?” “I’ve had them all my life.”

http://instantrimshot.com/

mhogan1830@gmail:disqus .com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender asks “HEY AZURA?” “what?” *BITCH SLAP*

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…  and noticed Tyrael is serving hot chocolate with Diablo 3 game cds as coasters.  

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…When Sara realises, they are all charrsFour other races are needed to have one of each To have all five races in a party at beach.Oh Dear says Sara, holding a beerDancing alone, felling a tear.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… They get drunk and fight … Asura wins.

… and Skeeter say: we don’t like your kind around here…

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar, the barkeep says “What’ll it be?”. The Sylvari orders water, the Charr some milk and the Asura asks for the finest ale. The barkeep eyes up the Asura and tells her that she looks under age but he’ll let her off this once with no ID. 

Suddenly the upholders of law storm in just as she is starting to sip at the pint. They shout “Book her!” The Asuran turns around and says “How dare you!” and summons a Golem to deal with them. 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…The bartender looks at them and asks, “So what are you having boys?”
The asuran responds back to the bartender in a smart manor, “A cup of your best magical ale please, Im feeling a bit drained due to casting and rambling about my intelligence along with random facts.”
The sylvari responds with an act the bartender has never been asked, “Here are some roots and leaves I have found on my journeys so please make me the best ale you can with them.”
The charr then responds with a typical response, “A hunk of meat from your finest rack and a keg of ale please. Oh and please dont bother opening it I have my armor spikes to do that.”
After hearing this the bartender looks at them shocked with their demands and gladly responds back, “Please please dont take this in the wrong way but all I have is human ale and if you dont like get out. Oh and as for you charr your more likely to blow the keg up than open it due to your savage strength. On another note, 3 cups of ale, right?”
The travelers now look at the bartender in a puzzled look and respond all at the same time with, “Human ale will be fine we guess we’re just a little parched.”
Off in the distance they hear a bell go off and without paying they leave to fight the monstrous dragon not knowing who the bartender is……
Without even a blink from the companions they are now sitting in a nearby graveyard asking themselves what the hell happened.

The bartender they just ripped off was one of the creators of GW2, he summoned the powers of Grenth to one shot them without the penalty of banishment, but, gave them the blessing of a message stating, “Dont piss the bartender off or any NPC you never know who your messing with. Have fun play safe. OH yeah that dragon kill is mine. TEEHEE KILL STEAL!!”

Sorry for the long message but had to do it. Kind of find it funny though due to half the people misspelling the race names.

The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this, a joke?”

Kevinthomas@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… and realised they had to be 18+ to enter ;/
vattenmarre@hotmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and each one of them orders a mug of alchool. They drank it fast, and ordered another one and another and another… After a while and as they were ordering the 5th mug, the owner advised them:
-That isn’t good for your health! You should stop drinking…
The three friends then said:
-We know, specially with what we have…
After that, the owner asked:
-What do you guys have?
And they answered with:
-We have only a 1 copper in our pockets!

the end

and only the Asura doesn’t get clotheslined.

An Asura, Slyvari, and a Charr walk into a bar.  Ouch!  What are the odds of that happenin?

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and ask wheres the counter.
then the norn appears.

An short asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar 
The Sulvary and the Charr asked 3 nice glasses of a beer,
then the barman asked who will drink the left beer because he dont had seen the short Asura behind he bar, your imaginary friend?
 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The Elder Dragon bartender looks up and says, “Is this some kind of joke?”

An asura, sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar. They see all the drunk humans, and walk out again.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.. because they were too drunk already since they would never be friends with each other!

An Asura, a Charr and a Sylvari walk into a human bar.

The Asura notices the ancient contraptions for pouring ale, and mourns the intelligence of the humans.

The Charr notices a plate of roast beef being shared between party members, and mourns the taste of the humans, who cannot seem to appreciate a good raw meal.

The Sylvari, however, sits himself upon a wooden seat at the polished wooden bar, and strikes up a cheerful conversation with the bartender. Confused, the Asura and the Charr follow to see what he could find to be so happy about in a bar belonging to humans.

‘You’re Sylvari,’ says the Asura, motioning to the heavy wooden beams in the ceiling and the collection of dead potted plants along one wall. ‘Shouldn’t you be depressed over how much death and destruction there is here for you?’

‘Oh, no.’ replies the Sylvari, tapping the bar with a smirk. ‘I never much liked my family anyway.’

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…but only the lucky people with beta access could see them. They did some amazing things, that everyone should see!

To get drunk after they defeated all evil monsters around!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walked into a bar… the bartender say: “Long day? drinks on the house.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, each of them order a drink. After 10 minutes of waiting they call the barman and ask:”When will the drinks be ready?”
The barman answers:
“When they’re done”.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…

While the asura slipped right under it and the charr was too hardheaded to even flinch, the sylvari remains in critical condition…

The questions still remain, why all 3 of them happened to walk into the same bar, and why there was a bar hanging in the middle of the path.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…and say ” Cn i Have a Milk Pls!”

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar… called “No Drunks Allowed”.   The bartender turns around and asks “What’ll have you Charr?”.  The Charr replies “A round of beer for my new friends and I?”.  The bartender give him a puzzled look and says “New friends?”  Charr looks around and sees his 2 friends are no where in sight.  All the Charr sees in Norms, Humans, and more Charrs.  Then he says to the bartender “Did you see where my Asura and Sylvari friends went?”  The bartender gives him a stern look and shouts “We don’t allow their kind here in NDA!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The slyvari ordered some food, and the barkeep gave the slyvari a bright lamp. The blood legion charr ordered some food too, but the bar keep said ” Sorry, we don’t serve blood in here.” Feeling up to it, the ausra made a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… with all three hurting in agony and with a bump on their heads they wonder to themselves, we must look pretty rediculous all waking into the same steel bar! Ouch! o.O

and the asura goes to get their drinks, but trips on the way back and drops them down the sink.  The asura and charr begin to spar, and the beast in fur is winning so far. The sylvari cries why can’t there be peace, and the charr yells back Shut up you bag of leaves. The asura is about to fall, but runs to the bathroom to hide in the stall. The charr follows as an angry gent, but did not realize the asura’s intelligence. The asura had caltrops on the floor, which only hurt the charr even more. The charr became crippled as the sylvari arrived, and saw what the asura had contrived. They watched under the stall for a bit, and saw the floor become a river of sh*t. they couldn’t stand the smell which is easy to see, and got out of the bathroom fast as could be. They ran from the stench, which as far as smells went, really should earn me a beta key.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…Because the PROPHECIES said that if they did, they would get satisFACTIONS before NIGHTFALL!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…

Asura: “What did you guys hit your heads on?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar fill of jokesand they said together with disgusted faces : (Unfortunately,20 beta key will be lost in the tide)

LKOGL@hotmail.com

A level 10 charr, level 12 asura, and level 20 sylvari walk into a bar.

“What’ll you have?” Bartender asks the charr, “whiskey” he responds.
“What’ll you have?” Bartender asks the asura, “yes yes, whiskey sounds fine” asura replies.

the bartender gets the two their drinks, and the sylvari looks at him.
“I’ll take a whiskey as well” he says. Bartender looks at the sylvari, “sorry we don’t serve your level here”

The three quickly left the bar, realizing azeroth just wasn’t the best place for friends to get a drink.

Najfore@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… but only the Sylvari is seen entering as it is her story instance.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar. One starts to insult the other two. He screams, ,,I slept with your mother!” The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other GW2 champions will do. The first again yells, ,,I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!”
The other two champions says, ,,Go home dad you’re drunk.”

email: robertseidl93@gmail.com 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…  You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

A Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar. The Asura just walks under it.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…The Charr says to the barman, “I want a pint of your finest ale because it makes me feel stronger”.  So the barman pours him an ale.The Asura say to the barman, “I’ll have an energy drink because it helps me think faster”, so the barman gets him an energy drink.The Sylvari, inquisitive as always, asks the barman, “give me something that’ll make me feel healthier”.  So the barman shits in in a glass…(reference to manure for plants for those who are a bit slow)

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender asks “what bring you three around?” The Asura says, “To test out my new ‘inebriation inhibitor’ which I’m certain will work.” The Sylvari says, “Poor little guy can’t handle his liquor so he made a machine to help.”The Charr says, “A real warrior doesn’t require aid to drink!”"He can’t help that he is so small that drinking does him in. This new invention could be interesting. Show us how it works .. hey, where did he go?” asks the Sylvari.The Charr burbs. “Sorry, I just get so hungry.”squarebob@hotmail:disqus.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The sylvari order a vegetable juice, the charr order a flaming sambuca and the asura order some hot sake. The charr ask the asura if he’s got asian family and the asura answers: “according to your reasoning, your family must live in my chimney” and the sylvari added: “and I just drank my brother”

An asura,
sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. All three of them order drinks and continue
their night. When it comes time for the
bill, the Asura looks in his wallet and states “I can’t pay, I’m a little
short.” The Sylvari replays “I won’t beat around the bush, I completely forgot
my wallet.” Finally the Charr proclaims “Fine, I’ll pay up this time, but if I hear
anymore puns I’m going to have a catniption”

Trauma-center@hotmail.com

An Asura, Sylvari and charr walk into a bar, the Sylvari ask “What do you think of the weather?”
The Asura replies “It could be inproved.”
The Sylvari ask “how?”
The Charr interrupts “with war machines.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk in to a bar and scarface jumped in and shot everybody. :)

angerfistfin@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… Charr: Asuras first..

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, well Actually just the charr does since the sylvari and asura were short enough to duck under it.

Not the kinda bar you thought it was hey?

“An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar…”
“No wait, only the Sylvari and the Charr do, the Asura walks UNDER the bar!!”
- All credit goes to Mad King Thorn, so long as the beta key goes to me. ;)

For the purpose of originality, a couple more, nowhere near as good as that comic genius Thorn’s:

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar, but are interrupted. It was a skill bar.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar, loudly and repeatedly announcing their presence to everyone as they do.
The bartender, confused, asks “What are you doing?”
“Oh, nothing,” the Charr responds, “just pinging my bar!”

  An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar in Hoelbrak and make their orders by the barkeeper. 
  The Asura asks for a juniper, minth and mead fusion brew over a chemiplasmithermostatic pad to keep the brew warm…with an umbrella on top…the barkeeper than checks for a miracle under the stand and replies: “sorry mate, only mead around here, i could warm it up for u if u want”, when he rises his head the asura is already picking his drink from inside a GOLEM, “too slow bookah”. The barkeeper imidiatly tells him to piss off. 
  Next is the Silvary who, for obvious reasons, asks for a glass of water, to wich the barkeeper imidiatly replies: “we dont serve water, piss off”.
  And finally he goes to the Charr, whos already delighting himself with a glass of milk, who as an excuse says “i poured it myself” (charr= cowcat). To wich the barkeeper also tells him to piss of.
  Also rumour has it that it was during this event that the “I took and arrow to the knee” became famous, when an already drunk human adventurer suddenly enters the bar demanding women, Ale and Music.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. As soon as they enter, every single humain in this bar stopped drinking and jumped on the 3 new comers. The Charr grabs his two small friends  and pulled them behind him to protect them.  
- “What’s the matter here!” says the Charr.
- “Are you real?” asks one of the humans.
- “What do you mean, Human?”
- “No, no, sorry sir, I’m talking to the Asura and the Sylvari behind you…”
The two small creatures look at each other, surprised and not understanding what is going on.
- “Can we play with you” says another human standing next to the first one?
The Charr is getting anxious, he could break a couple of humans and save his life by scaring them, but he’s not sure he could protect the two others from a stab or a cut…
- “Stop bothering them guys!” Says the barman. “Go back to your seat, you’ll have all the time in the world to play with a Sylvari or an Asura”.
- “OK but when?” asks another human.- “… when the game is ready”

:-)

…to order drinks after a long day of dunegon reaping. The charr orders an irish coffee with extra cream but is thrown out for scratching the furniture. The asura orders a jackhammer but is not served because he can’t reach the bar stool. Finally, the sylvari orders an entire round for the bar so that he won’t be used to replace the furniture the charr destroyed or as a club by the angry asura.

twitter: epolsdofer :)

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and I say to myself, “Dude I got to stop playing Guild Wars while I’m stoned.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… the asura and the charr killed the sylvari and asked the bartender for some water: “There’s some tea to be done!”

Asura, Sylvari and charr walk into a bar. bartender Yells: “ASURA YOUR NOT IMPLEMENTED YET!!!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar  and the bartender say’s to the asura “Can i have some weed?”

An asura, sylvari, and charr walk into a bar and they all order a drink for themselves. The human bartender puts the drinks down and says, “Boy, aren’t you all an ugly lot.” The asura sighs, the sylvari glares, and the charr growls. Intense stares hit the bartender from across the counter. When they finally break eye contact, the trio notices their drinks missing. The charr asks, “Hey! What’s the meaning of this racism?!” The bartender grins. “Your drinks were there a second ago, cat. You can’t fool me.”

The group sighs and orders another round. The asura clambers his way onto the bar stool and the bartender laughs. “Your bar should be fitted for all races!” Said the angry asura. The three began to argue again, but then stopped when they noticed their drinks missing again. “Okay what is the meaning of this? What kind of mesmer spells are you using on us?” said the irritated sylvari.

The bartender laughed mockingly and shook his head. “I ain’t done nothin’ with your drinks.” Fed up, the trio got off their bar stools and began to head for the door. As they neared the exit, a Norn theif with 6 glasses on his table bid them farewell.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… 
There’s no punchline because Nickleback was playing, and ruining music isn’t funny.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, but the Security Guard throw them out, because they don’t have a beta key.

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and the charr ask for a glass of beer “Do you have a glass of beer?”. The bartender replies “Oh, Sorry we ran out of beer. But we have orange juice, you want it?”. The Charr replies “Orange Juice??!! Orange juice just for kids! Like Asura!!”. Asura got angry “What did you say?! Kids?! Me?!! Before i make this thing worse, better we fight outside!. The Charr said “Challenge Accepted!”. The Sylvari confusion with the behavior of charr and asura, he said “Jeez, both of you act like a kid! Fight because heckled orange juice just for kids?! Don’t you know? I am 80 years old, and i love orange juice!”. Asura and Charr said “Shut up old man! This is our business!”. And the old Sylvari gone mad “You make me mad Rascal!! Wouryaa!!”. The sylvari strike them and the bar were destroyed. The Bartender said “You 3 Idiots! You shall indemnify!! Or i call a police!!” The Charr,Asura, and Sylvari said “Sorry sir, we forgot to put the fight outside.” The bartender reacts “FFFFUUUUUUUUUU!!!!”Hope you enjoy it! Sorry if not funny and my bad english ^^    

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar , Bartender said did not see the sign on the door? NO rats , plants and cat-dogs in the BAR goddamned !!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… they sit and order to drink to the norn barmaid, when drunk they started to discuss about who is the bravest of them.
Suddenly the charr shouts “Hulda! Give me an axe!”, the barmaid gives it to him and he cuts his left arm….Then the sylvary shouts  “Hulda! A torch!”  the barmaid gives it to him and he without hesitation burns his left arm and leg without make any noise…
is the turn of the asura at the end, he hesitates a bit, then he stands up and goes in front of the barmaid and says “Hulda! I’m much stronger than you! You whining little girl!”….

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…  and the bartender ask them to dance for a drink… the 3 friends unsuccesfully try to dance, after 3 hours of trying,  the bartender look at them and Laughing at them yells… the /dance command is not implemented yet … you fools!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… and order 3 drinks.  The bartender looked at the Asura and says ‘I can’t serve you any drinks unless you’re 21′ so the Asura walks out think ‘Where does a 22 year old have to go to get a drink around here?’

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a World of Warcraft bar… Wait… How’s that even possible since They raped the game!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
Darn rubberbanding!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…cause they were diablo and got error 37

How many necromancers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. They like the dark better.
OR
One necromancer… and 16 minions
solanylander@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.  The asura and sylvari sit at a table and begin talking about life.  The charr orders a dwarven ale and some mandragor root cake.  After he eats, he stands up and pulls out a pistol shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The charr puts 500 gold on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door, the bartender asks why the charr shot everyone. The charr tells him to look it up on Guild Wars Wiki. The bartender looks up “Charr” and he reads “Charr: savage feline fighting race. Eats shoots and leaves.”

… and they sit down in front of the bartender and ordered drinks. The charr then asks his friends what they had ordered.

The asura responds, “I ordered a whiskey because I found evidence that some bumbling idiot moved my new golem to my sister’s clothes shop then fell off its shoulder ripping its head off trying to stay up!”

The sylvari answers, “I ordered a beer because of the same situation! My beloved was trying on some clothes at your sister’s shop and she claims someone sent a golem to peak at her in the changing room!”

“That’s preposterous!” The asura exclaimed, “No asura is even REMOTELY attracted to your kind!”

After a short pause both turned to the charr and asked, “What about you?”

“I don’t know,” he replied, “but I nearly broke my leg trying to find out.”

An Asura, Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar.
They were blind.

A Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar… The Sylvari walks to the bar, sits down and orders a drink. The Charr and Asura sit down at a table glaceing over  at the bar they notice the Sylvari staring at his drink, “I wonder what has him down.” says the Charr, so he gets up and walks over to the bar grabs the Sylvari’s drink and chugs it down. The Sylvari starts crying and the Charr looks at him and says; “Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I’ll buy you another drink.”

“No, That’s not it.” Says the Sylvari; “I fell asleep on the council, our head council member, in a outrage asks me to resign. When I left I went outside to get my mount and someone had stolen it.”

“The guards say they can do nothing. So I walk home and when I get there my wife is sleeping in our bed with the gardener, so I left home to come to this bar.”

“And when I was thinking about putting my life to a end, you come and drink my poison.”
:X

The bartender asks, “What can I do for you?”

The Asura replies, “I’ll have a-”

A long silence follows, everyone stares at the little guy.

“Well?” the bartender urges.

*Asura has lost connection*

An Asura, Sylvari and Charr walk into a bar, sitting down and ordering heavy drinks. Two minutes pass, and none were yet to be served. The Charr slams his hands against the wooden surface, visibly impatient.
“How long does it take to get a beverage around here?!”"When it’s ready.”

exanrecovery@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and the racist human bartender tells them to get out.

An Asura, Sylvari, and Charr walk into a bar.  They order their respected drinks and head for the door, but that’s when someone opened the door got on the floor and everybody walked the dinosaur.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, the sit at a table and call the barman.”We’ll pay a drink to everyone in here!” they said to the strong man.The barman send the waitress to every occupied table and gives them a drink. A bit later, the asura, sylvari and the charr ask the barman to come back at their table.

“We’ll pay a second drink to everyone in here!” they say, once again, to the barman.

The barman does the same thing as last time, sends the waitress to every table and gives them a second drink. A bit later again, the asura, sylvari and the charr ask the barman to come back at their table, once again.
“We’ll pay a third drink to everyone in here!” they say to the barman.He asks: “Do you even have the money to pay all these drinks?”They answer: “Oh no we don’t!”He yells: “Then get the hell out of my bar!” and kicks them out.Our 3 friends come back to the same bar the next day. They sit at a table and ask the barman: “We’ll pay a drink to everyone in here! Except you… Because you’re mad when you’re drunk…”

An Asura, Sylvari, and a Charr walks into a bar the barman tells them, “if you can sit in my basement for a day, i’ll give you free beer forever.”
The Asura walks down there first. After five minutes she comes up and says, “it’s impossible, you got a swarm of flies down there.”So the Sylvari tries his luck, but can’t take more than an hour.Finally the Charr goes down. When he returns a day later, the others ask him how he dit it. He says, “Easy! i took a dump in one corner and sat in the other!”
per6409@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…

 and all get killed by a fly…

 ”Victims of Dynamic Level Adjustment – RIP ”

….the bartender says “what’ll you have?” the charr looks at the guy and says “none of your business!”

why is six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine.

keep it simple, keep it real!

turtles

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The Asura asks the Sylvari: “Do you have any PLANTS for the weekend?”The Sylvari answers: “No, I’m a little SHORT on money.”
The Charr is annoyed and asks the two of them to be quiet and beastill.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The Charr looks at the Asura and asks the Sylvari: “Are you gonna finish that?”

The asura and charr continuously poke fun at the sylvari until she finally exclaims “Will you two just LEAF me the FAUNA alone?!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… AND THEY GOT DRUNK!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… hehe

……the sylvari asks the bartender “where is the bathroom?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… norn door guard says: “STOP”
sylvari asks:”is there a problem?”

Norn:”no underaged children allowed in the bar!”

Charr:”what? we dont gotz any juvenile muttons here Meat, just battle worn veterans trying to get some booze.”
Norn pointing out what seems to be the obvious:”well, your puny friend here seems to be quite small for a drinker.”

Asura:”are your out of your mind? i have existed for 70 years, 22days, 15hours 22minutes,36seconds and counting; you must be insane to call me a child, did you fail to see my foot long beard?”
Norn:”well, I’m gonna have to check some id here.”

Asura:”Blasted be the Dwarfs, my wallet was burned by an imbecile destroyer, just minutes ago.”

Charr to the norn:”meat, this snack here don’t need no id check, he’ll go down with my wine.”

Norn:”very well sir, if you need to use the grill please notify the bartender before hand, and, have a good time.”

-slyfeniii@hotmail.com

and the asura is the only one to crack a joke

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar, The bartender goes up to the Asura and says “Sorry son, I’m not allowed to serve underaged patrons” Frustrated, the Asura scurries out of the bar. Next the bartender goes up to the Char and says, “Sorry sir but rules say there are no animals allowed”, beaming with rage the Char too storms out. Finally the bartender goes up to the Sylvari and says,”So what will you have to drink” to which the Sylvari replies ” Ill take a glass of water”.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
They are discussing where are human? Suddently, they hear that human is playing Guild Wars 2 BWE!? WTF? Why are they at the bar????

An asura, sylvari and charr walk into a bar… The asura didn’t need to duck.

…

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…it hurt like hell!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and as they order drinks the Asura turns to the Charr and asks “Can I borrow some cash for drinks? I’m a little short.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender says “Sorry, no pets allowed.” The sylvari looks at the Charr, confused. The Char looks at the Asura, confused. The Asura looks at the Sylvari and says “Don’t worry, his limbs have been clipped and he won’t wet himself so long as he wasn’t fed in the last 3 hours.”

Corny, but it’s the best I could come up with in 5 minutes.

An asura, sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar. After enjoying a round of beers together the asura turns to the charr and says, “I challenge you to a drinking game. Whoever holds their liquor longest gets to take the lovely sylvari on a date.” The charr laughs and says, “You think you can beat me? I am the biggest one here. You’re nothing but a lightweight.” The asura smirks and says, “There is one stipulation. I get to choose the next round of drinks.” The charr and sylvari agree. The asura walks up to the bar and orders up three light beers. He brings them back to the table. The charr laughs, “You can order up any drink, and you come back with a light beer? I thought you asurans were supposed to be smart!” He downs the beer. The sylvari politely says, “What do you have up your sleeve this time?” The asura winks at her and slams his beer. He then turns to the charr and says, “You don’t look so hot tough guy. How do you feel?” The charr stands up and staggers to the bathroom, laughing uncontrollably. The asura turns to the sylvari and says, “So how do you feel about a date?” The sylvari bats her eyes and flirtatiously says, “I would be honored.” The bartender calls the asura to come back over to the bar and says, “I’ve been watching you. What did you do to win this challenge?” They asura laughs and says, “Oh you know, just a special tonic for each drink. A little cat nip for the charr, and some fertalizer for the sylvari here. Knowledge is Power!” 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, suddenly the charr strikes down the unsuspecting asura.
- Why have you done such a thing?! – asked the sylvari.
- Doctor’s orders! He told me next time I went to a bar I should “cut down” so I did…

r-vyper@hotmail.com

 An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into bar.
You probably thought that this Asura was alive and this Sylvari was alive and this Charr was alive. Nope it’s Chuck Testa.

Give me the key

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.-And the bartender looks at them, and says: The class trainers aren`t here lads, this isn`t Goldshire

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… dust traps will do that

A sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. They both say “ow!”. The Asura looks up to see what all the fuss is about.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. After drinking for a while, the asura goes to the bartender and tells him “I bet you a thousand gold that i can piss into that glass 10 meters from here without missing”. The bartender thinking that it’s impossible accepts de deal. So the asura starts pissing the customers, the chairs, even the bartender, he pisses on everything except the glass. When he finished, the bartender is really happy, cos he won. The asura asks him why is he so happy, he just got his entire bar pissed, and the bartender says “I just won a thousand gold dude, why are YOU so happy about it, you just lost a thousand gold.” and the asura says to him “Do you see the sylvari and the charr over there? Well i betted them 5 thousand gold that i could piss on your entire bar and you would be happy about it.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… when suddenly Charr turns around and yells: Wait a second.. the Sylvari doesnt belong here, and where for god sake is that damn Norn?!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The Bartender asks what can I do you for, the Sylvari replies I have a porn star, the asura replies bud light, and the charr replies I have smirroff. The bartender servers the Asura and the Charr their drinks, the Sylvari replies where’s mine? the Bartender replies she’s right behind you.

An asura, sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar. after few drinks they start to argue about their spouses. the bartender overheard them talking so he ask, “I have always been curious”, “How did you know which one is male”?

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
The charr notices the human bartender.
“I’ll have a beer, fleshling” says the Charr.
“Hey there is no need for you talk to me like that. How would you like it if I talked like that to you?” says the human.
“Why don’t we swap places and find out?” says the charr.
The char and human swap places.
The human  walks up beside the asura and sylvari to the charr who is now behind the bar and says “Hey you beast, give me a beer!”.
The charr replies back with “Sorry we don’t server fleshlings, midgets or tree huggers here!”

An Asura, Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar…
Discussing the drinking achievement…
Charr: “I’m just not sure that the achievement is as hard as it used to be.”
Sylvari: “yeah, I seem to not be affected as much, what do you think?”
The Sylvari and Charr turn to the Asuran.
Asura: “I don’t know about you guys, but I asuran drunk!” 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
The charr notices the human bartender.
“I’ll have a beer, fleshling” says the Charr.
“Hey there is no need for you talk to me like that. How would you like it if I talked like that to you?” says the human.
“Why don’t we swap places and find out?” says the charr.
The char and human swap places.
The human  walks up beside the asura and sylvari to the charr who is now behind the bar and says “Hey you beast, give me a beer!”.
The charr replies back with “Sorry we don’t server fleshlings, midgets or tree huggers here!”

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar; each with a troubled look on his face. As the sappy bunch trudges up to the counter, the bartender turns to them and exclaims, “You guys look terrible!” As the bartender gets them their drinks, he listens to their tales of woe.The Asura, an Elementalist pipes up first. “Everyone makes fun of me because I’m short. I should be talking down to them because of how intelligent I am! I should be th…”The Charr, a Mesmer, interrupts, “I have these weird clones that follow me everywhere! And whenever I try to convince people the clones are real, they explode into pink butterflies! I think I might be going mad.”The Sylvari adds in, “I keep finding Mantis in my hair.”After listening to they’re story, he shakes his head saying, “You guys think you have it tough? Look over there.” He points to a dark corner of the bar; A depressed drunken human sits drinking away his troubles. “See that sad sack a bones over there in the shadowy corner? He has a wife and 4 kids to take care of. He lost his job, and now no one will hire him. His name is ‘XxEpic HealzxX’. He just maxed his drunkard’s title tonight.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and nothing happens. You thought it would be a racist joke? Your bad. (anti-joke chicken stíle :D)

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.  The bar tender looks up and asks is this some kind of a joke?

Why does the Asura speak to the Charr? -Because the Charr is CHARRming. xD 

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
The barmaid comes over
to the Charr and says “We don’t serve your kind.” He roars and leaves.
She walks to the Asura and pats him on the head “We don’t serve your
kind.” He frowns and leaves. The Sylvari greets the barmaid, “And do you
serve my kind?” The barmaid smiles and almost can’t contain her
excitement, “Yes, yes we do. And our shipment hasn’t come in. Your kind
we do serve,” she exclaims as she points to the big all you can eat
salad bar, “You should be enough to fill the bar for a week.”

An asura, charr and a Sylvari walk into a bar

The Asura says: “I have the biggest ears of the World”

The Sylvari says: “I have the thinnest body of the world”

The Charr says: “I have the biggest cock of the world”

They go to the Guinness World Records

The Asura comes back and says: “I have really the biggest ears of the world”

The Sylvari comes back and says: “Cool, I have the thinnest body of the world”

The Charr comes back angrily: “Shit, Chuck Norris was here before -.-”

Ouch!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…. to drink beer and forget the fight with his girlfriends

Sylvari knocks on door. *knock* *knock*
Asura: Who’s there?
Sylvari: Me.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar to talk to a pretty lady. After a short conversation, a group of humans turn into zombies behind our heroes. The zombies one shot our champions of Tyria. And thats how we died in Hardcore Inferno.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and ordered 3 buttermilk. The bartender replied, ‘you missed the sign on the door?”No dwarves, pets or vegetables will be served in the queensdale bars as long as they can not show their mothers that are over 300 years old’

Human: Okay so an asura, sylvari and a cow walk into a bar…
Charr: FOR THE LAST TIME I’M NOT A COW, IMMA …CHARRR…and and IMMA BEAST.
Asura and Sylvari: These bars…..black magic bars our way :{. Let us out!
Charr: Teehee, maybe next Beta Weekend folks. Now lemme have a BEER!
Human: Cheers!
Norn: What ’bout me?! :O

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar,
after awhile they leave the bar drunk as hell and started to walk on the rails.After the first few steps Sylvary says:
“I do not understand why are stairs today so apart”
After a while Charr complains:
“How is this fence built so low …”
Over time, the Asura says:
“End of problem! Elevator has come!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender yells, “Hey! Didn’t you read sign?!”  The asura looks at the charr, and charr looks at the sylvari.  The bartender yells again, “No pets allowed!”   

An Asura, a Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar.  The Barkeep asks each what they want to eat and drink.  They each order until it gets to the Charr, who simply looks at the barkeep and orders a flagon of ale.  The barkeep asks curiously, “What about your food?” and the Charr barks out a laugh before exclaiming, “Why would I need food?  I have the Meat and salad course right here!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender yells,
“Hey! Didn’t you read sign?!”  The asura looks at the charr, and the charr
looks at the sylvari.  The bartender yells again, “No pets allowed!”   

An
asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… they are in a heated conversation
on whose race is “the best.” The Asura speak at length using words
most have never heard before about how their race is clearly the smartest. The
Sylvari counters with a long winded monologue on the wisdom of the trees. The
Char grunts and looks hungrily at the Asura wondering if he’ll make a good bar
food snack.

The human
behind the bar smiles and says humans are the sneakiest then pulls the hidden
lever to the trap door causing the Asura, Sylvari and Charr to fall into a pit
of ancient crocodiles.

An asura, sylvari, and a char walk into a bar.  The human chuckles and walks underneath.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, the Bartender asks the charr: “Hey, why the long face?”

An asura, a sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The charr says to the asura “why are you doing that?” the asura replys “i dont know, someone please help me, i cant stop jumping and dancing with the sylvari, its like im being controlled by someone else! And where the hell did my clothes disappear to”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar :Charr : WHERE IS MY BEER ??
Azura : WHERE IS MY PUNCH ??
Sylvaris : Plz where is my Royal Kir ?

Charr and Azura : WTF ?! He is Gay for sure !

The Charr orders a short salad. ba-dud-ting

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and when they enter a commando class human shot the charr in the arm.
The charr screams “Ah, It hurts, heal me! heal me!”
The norn bartender comes along and says “Hahahaha we don’t have hospitals in this country”
The asura and the sylvari leaf while laughing at the charr.

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and forgot what they wanted. pff

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and the bartender screams,
“Ahhh!  Get that thing away from me!?” The charr apologize, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”  The bartender then says,  “Not you!  That!” (pointing at the asura)  “Treasure Trolls scare me!” 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The sylvari and charr gets injured while the asura continues to walk along.
 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… You think one of them would’ve seen it.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The Asure goes “No.. I’m not their kid, and yes I’m old enough to be here.” The Sylvari see’s that the bar is decorated in a forest theme, and sees a tree decoration and walks up to it and goes “Mother!? I thought you didn’t drink?” And well the Charr sits back and laughs at the Syvari, because he’s a mesmer and made the tree look like the Syvari’s mother.

An Asura, a sylvari and a charr walk into a bar:

The sylvari asks the bartender for a glass of wine.The bartender gives the sylvari his order.

The Charr orderes some whiskey. Imediately the norn bartender gets his order.

Last the asura orders his golem to be parked!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar
The Bartender asks the charr:
“Nice and balaced diet you got there huh”

An asura, sylvari, and a char walk into a bar.
The barman asks – “why the small, why the leafy and why the furry face?”.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
And asked for a drink but instead got rejected. Apparently cats and weeds aren’t allowed in and the asura was seen as an alien midget and was captured.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. “OUCH!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and leave after a few beats.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and then you get a cutscene and the world is in ruins.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a barrel and choke to death.

AN Asura,Sylvari,and a Charr walked into a bar …….The Charr decides to leave …. he notice’s that his horse’s testicles have been painted yellow…..the Charr storms back into the Bar and Yells “I want to know right now who painted my Horse’s Testicles Yellow!!!!!!…….The Big Human on the other side of the Bar stands up and Yells “I DID !!!!!” ……..the Charr then in fear Replied …..”I just wanted to let you know the first coats Dry ……..”

And the barman says: A plant, a cat and a goblin… mmm interesting day.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and get drunk as hell!(Simple but truthful ahah)

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, they barely barged the barbed barrier that barred the way in!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…and noticed that the Norn drunk all the beer!!!!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. A waitress approaches their table and asks the charr: »The usual?« The charr glances at his companions and replies: »Yes, but let’s throw some greens in there this time.«

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and confused barman says: “Is this some kind of joke or …?”

One day in Dalaran, an asura, sylvari and a char walk into The Filthy Animal for a drink. After a few drunken exchanged tales, everyone logs out with them and leaves Barmaid Mimbihi penniless – the bar had been raised.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. Suddenly, they realize it’s beta weekend! The charr dutifully rushes back to work, to please the eager beta testers, but the other two take a seat by the bardisk – seemingly without a care in the world. The bartender (who, by the way, secretly took time off from work to betatest this highly anticipated game), clearly upset, exclaims “Aha! So this is where you were you were hiding!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into the charr
bar, the Scratching Post, and each order a flask of firewater. The bartender,
Pyre Fiercesho,t turns to the asura and sylvari and says “I’m sorry, we don’t
serve food here.”
 

And create a new boys band : asurapper, sylvarythm and chaardrocker

And seeing the potential danger in the situation, the bartender promptly tells them all to leave.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar. You never see it till it hits you.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walked into a bar. The bartender said: is this a joke or something?

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The Charr asks for a mug of ale and the bartender quickly fetches it for him… the Asura asks for some sweet honey milk and the bartender quickly fetches it for him… the Sylvari asks for… and is quickly interrupted by the bartender “You’re kind doesn’t belong in here” to which the Sylvari retorts “Why not, I’m a fungi?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walked into a bar.
They all took their own drinks.
The bartender norn told them not to drink their own drinks.
The asura was clever and he gave his drink to the charr,
so he could drink the charr’s drink instead of his own.
The charr was mean and she kept both drinks.
The bartender was angry and he took both drinks from the charr and drank them. The sylvari was wise and went outside to drink.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… 
They sit down and started to drink.
The Asura asks the two others. Do you know about the joke no and me neither?
They sad no.
The Asura sad me neither. You didnt get it?
-No
-Me neither.

An asura, a Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar. The bartender says “I don’t serve your kind here! Get out!” Outraged, the Asura leaves cursing under his breath, the Sylvari solemnly walks out contemplating what the bartender meant by “Your kind” but the Charr takes a seat a the closest table. When the companions met up later, the Sylvari asks “Why didn’t you leave with us?” And the Charr replies “Because he was talking to the three norn behind you.”

An Asura, Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar,
“I wonder how Eir’s quarrel with Jormag fairs?” ponders Zojja while the bartender approaches. “Praise Dwayna it’s Destiny’s Edge but your missing Logan!” 
“Yes and you wouldn’t know where he is would you?” asked Caithe 
When they got their answer they left the bar, proceeded to find Logan and together the heroes, Zojja, Rytlock, Caithe, Logan, and soon after Eir proceeded to defeat the Elder Dragons.

An Asura, Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar……. they then walk out because their Human and Norn friends were not allowed in.

An asura, Sylvari, and a Charr walked into a bar. The Barkeep says to the Charr, “Hey, why do you three travel together? Seems like a pretty colorful group if you ask me”. The Charr responds. “Well, lets just say my previous companions just couldn’t outrun a centaur…. A good party is hard to find these days.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and the
sylvari is carrying a duck. The sylvari tells the other two to order whatever
they’d like. She then orders herself a drink and some water for the duck. The
bartender asks her how she’s going to pay and she puts her ear down to the duck,
argues with it a bit and finally say’s you don’t have to do that but fine. She
then tells the bartender that her friend the duck said to put it on his
bill.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, and I am handed a beta key.

An Asura, a Charr and a Sylvari walk into a bar. I would’ve thought after the first one did the other two would have been able to avoid doing the same.

An Asura, Sylvari and a Charr walk into a bar and order 3 pints of beer.
Unfortunately, there’s a fly floating in each pint.

The Asuran goes to the bartender and says, “Pardon me, but there’s a fly in my pint, could you pour me another?”

The Sylvari sees the fly, shrugs his shoulders, plucks out the fly and drinks.

The Charr grabs the fly by both wings and screams “SPIT IT OUT! SPIT IT OUT, YOU THIEVING NORN!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… the bartender looks up and says “well that can’t be right.  Two of you aren’t even playable yet!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…and … 
Wait a minute where is asura ohhh there he is under the table, anyway they walk in to the bar and …. CHARR HITS HUMAN WITH THE BOTTLE SYLVARI GOT BURNED AND !! … yea asura si still under the table.                                    THE END                                                                       

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
the bartender comes and sees them: “What’s this?!??! some kind of joke?!?!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
Discussing about who the best sword/blade user and betting all their golds…
The charr draws his sword and cuts 30 barrels of beer with one hit…
The crowd “applause” and was impressed….  
The sylvari laughs and draws his blade cuts a  5 glass of beer with i strike without fluctuating the the beer..
The crowd “applause” and was amazed….
Next was the asura sitting still on his chair *holding the handle of his small sword*
a mosquito pass by, the asura *swings his sword 3 times to the mosquito*, and the mosquito is still flying..
The Sylvari,Charr and the crowd laughed and teased the asura..
Then the asura said….. ” I Circumcised the mosquito ”
And the crowd gone crazy then the asura wins =)

The asura, charr and Sylvari to go into the pub. The charr yelled to the bartender to give me a beer, because it is masculine. The Asura fermented wheat beer instead ask,because the consumption of beer is prohibited by the Rules of Order. The Sylvari you stillfeel the base of the vitality of the common grains, and instant gets drunk.

The charr, a sylvari and an asura walk into a bar. the sylvari talks about his Great dream and adventures around tyria. the asura also talks about his adventures. However the charr had nothing to add because he TOOK AN ARROW TO THE KNEE!  BUD-DA-PHIS 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… They order their drinks and sit down.
 Out of nowhere approaches a drunken human. He walks up to the three and whispers something to them. After a minute or two he turn and walks to the Norn bartender.  He says to the bartender: HEY, I beeet juuu 50 gold I can piss in that cup across the bar from here. The Norn bartender seeing this as an easy 50gold accepts his bet.  The Human proceeds to pee allover the bar, the floor even the on the bartender, everywhere except the cup. The Norn starts to laugh and looks at the human in pity.  Oddly enough the human start laughing even louder, so the bartender looks at the human and asks: “Why are you so happy? You just lost 50 gold”   The human smiles and says: “well I might have lost 50gold, but do you see those 3 guys over there?  I’ve bet them 500 gold that I could piss all over you and your bar and not only would you not be mad mad at me, but you’d also laugh about it”Moral of this story: Humans might not have an extensive knowledge of Magic. We might not be the strongest race out there, but when it comes down to it, we will do anything to achieve our goal.
Contact: Twitter:  @JLKirchner, E-mail: joelkirchner@live.com

An Asura, a Sylvari, and a Charr walk into a bar, but all leave in confusion when they notice the bar changing as they grab their drinks.

bastufight@gmail.com

An Asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.
The Charr orders a cool pint.
The Sylvari orders a rum & coke.
The Asura doesnt order anything because he can’t see over the bar to look at the drinks!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The crowd stares at the cute and happy family!

……only the charr leaves.

jbmkratos@gmail.com

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… The Asura is going to the bathroom for her makeup. Thats why they’re not in this beta.

The bartender says, “Asura, Sylvari, Charr… A. S. C.”

“Now all you need are those Inquest Idiots and your A.S.C.I.I. Character Set is complete!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… just kidding, they were at the Lion King’s birthday party with the rest of the animals.

The Charr uses the sylvari as a mint leaf for his martini and uses the asura as a stool.

A Charr, an Asura and a Sylvari walk into a bar. The bartender goes to the Sylvari and asks:
Bartender: What’ll it be?
Sylvari: Water please.
The bartender then goes to the Asura, and asks the same question:
Bartender: What would you like?
Asura: I’ll have a beer, which i will distile, add some nanobots to the mixture…
The Asura then starts to talk to himself about what he will do for the next half an hour.
Lastly, the bartender turns to the Charr, and asks:
Bartender: Bro, do you need some help?
Charr, who is stuck in the doorway: I DO REQUIRE YOUR PITYFUL HELP, YOU UNWORTHY HUMAN! I AM A CHARR, AND I HAVE MY DIGNITY!
Charr:…Please call my warband…

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, the Charr get up, approached the Asuras and Sylvari and PAF !! its made Chocapic

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… and the barman says to the charr:”Hey!! What’s this long face!??” The charr looks at the barman and answers:”What do you mean?? I’m born like this!”.. The asura spits his beer laughing to the charr:”Ahaha!! He meant that you look sad!”..”Ohh!..” Says the charr, “I’m not sad, I’m terribly annoyed by my hair, I’m changing it for the summer and it itches so much!!”.. The sylvari looks at the charr and says:”It’s in these moments that I feel lucky to simply lose my leaves..”.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… and the bar tender says that Sylvari is going to have to LEAF.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… the azura asked for a small cup, the charr asked for a big glass, the sylvary wanted a plant pot 

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
5 minutes later the asura and the sylvari hastily leave in search of a new bar, as the charr begins to create a mini Searing within the bar because they were out of Firewhisky

an asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar, the sylvari and charr said ouch! the asura fit under it

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. They spent 80 USD purchasing their drinks. But the bartender would not give them those drinks. They tried to get a refund and leave, but nothing came of that either. When they ask why, the bartender says “Error 37″.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… to try and pickup the ladies.

The asura quips, “my cerebrum isn’t the only physionetically extranormous apparatus I possess if you comprehend what I’m relaying!” 

The sylvari exclaims, “your endurance bar must be zero, because you’ve been rolling through my Dream of Dreams all night!” 

The charr roars, “are you from the Iron Legion? Because you’re making me hard!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
… but the place is really overcrowded all the people in there are making really bad “An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…”-jokes, so they leave and search for a place less… strange. XD

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… actually just the Sylvari and Charr. The Asura walked right under it.

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… this was very unfortunately a human only bar as in this part of town it was segregated from the other ‘non-human’ races. These poor souls were slaughtered for being different. Then the asura, sylvari and charr all walk out peacefully never to been seen again.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… you’d think one of them would have ducked.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and got shot by the barkeep

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… and come out soon because is closed.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. The Charr says ‘ouch’, the Sylvari ducks and the Asura walks right under it.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar … and bar fight!!

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…after a half hour of drinks the asura and sylvari notice the charr peaking in his armor, thinking nothing of it.  Thirty minutes go buy and they both notice his check again, starting to wonder?  Another thirty minutes go but and the charr checks again, the asura and sylvari ask why do you keep checking your armor what’s in there?  The charr replies “it’s a picture of my hairy wife, I get to go home once she starts to look good”  :P

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and meet colin johanson, together they drank a beer, drank a beer again and drank it again …

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…  and ask for a drink. They sit at a table off to the side and quietly talk while they wait. When they are finished drinking they pay their bill, leave an appropriately sized tip, and walk out the door thanking the barkeep on their way out.
When the door closes the barkeep wipes off the sweat on his forehead, breathes a sigh of relief, and says to the server: “All the stories I’ve heard of those three were greatly exaggerated. That wasn’t so bad.”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.It was a Gay Norn Warrior Day.

 An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…but having never completed law school in North America are unfamiliar with our judicial process and depart disheartened and dismayed.

…and the bartender says, “What is this, some kind of joke?”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…
The ArenaNet bartender asks, “What will it be?”

The Charr pushes his way first in line and asks, “I want some crispy bacon with a side of burnt toast.”
The ArenaNet bartender says, “This is a bar not a restaurant get out!”
The Charr pouts and leaves the bar.

The Sylvari is next in line and asks, “May I have something vegan? I’m a little anxious when it comes to ordering something processed, or has anything to do with hurting, being tested or harming animals, and honestly it’s just -”
The ArenaNet bartender interrupts and says, “Look lady, this is a bar, now you came here for a drink and I’ll give you one, but I can’t insure any of the above so you might as well leave.”
The Sylvari scowls and “leaves.”

The Asura goes to the ArenaNet bartender, but before he could ask what he wants the ArenaNet bartender laughs and says, “Okay little man what would you like to have? Would you like some bacon or perhaps something vegan?”
The Asura smiles and says, “I would like one Screwdriver please.”
The ArenaNet bartender exclaims in delight, “That’s what I’m talking about. Finally someone ordered a drink around here. One Vodka and Orange coming right up!”

The Asura says, “No, no, no! I need a screwdriver for my siege golem. It broke down when I was on my way here.”
The ArenaNet bartender slaps his face, and murmurs to himself, “I’m so glad my shift is almost over so I can finally RELEASE.”

i hope no one clicks on this 
http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111214064523/halo/images/d/dc/Troll_face.png

After a long dungeon run, an asura, a sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and fainted from massive concussion. 
” Damn… We really should use the door.. next time ” was the charr last words..

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar… and walked minutes later out of a wreckage.

.. just Singing In the Rain and dance all night. The End.

 An asura, a sylvari, and a charr walk into a bar………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar get drunk and dance like crazy not even care in there surroundings :D

A sylvari and a charr walk into a bar.

The asura walks underneath it.

An Asura, Sylvari and Charr walk into a bar. The Asura says to the Charr, “Go Fetch the stick!”

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar. But got kicked out, because there’s a sign that says “NO CAT, NO MOUSE & NO PLANT”. And they left saying “RACIST BASTARD”.

robotoksasa@hotmail.com

… and the bartender thought, “Thank the Gods, there is still for Tyrian Peace!”

Guile theme goes with everything even (An asura, sylvari and a charr walking into a bar)

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar…but the asura got turned away at the door. They don’t serve minors.

An asura, sylvari and a charr walk into a bar and order up some drinks. The charr ordered a mug of milk; the sylvari ordered a mug of water; and the asura ordered a mug of beer. The bartender ask the charr and sylvari why they are not drinking beer. The charr replied ” i need the calcium to grow out my horns.” The sylvari answered,” i need Water to Survive and grow.” Then the bartender asked the asura, ” why are you drinking beer when your friends are not?” the asura stood on the stool, raised his mug and shouted out ” I go big or I go home!”